Stripped Innocence
by lugia39
Summary: I hate myself.
1. Broken

I know it's been _ages_since I started this story, so here is to all of you who've waited patiently for it to be expanded upon…whoa, big words. O_O

James POV

It was an extremely boring day in apartment 2J. The swirly slide's never been this underused since we moved to Los Angeles . Ever since we finished recording our album, we've had a _lot_ of free time. Other than a few scattered performances of the song "Til' I Forget about You," we've pretty much been in a very depressing slump.

That is, when we choose to STAY…in apartment 2J. Outside of that depressing alternate dimension, we still have a couple of other things to occupy our time. Sabotaging the new kids' auditions, chasing after the Jennifers, annoying Mr. Bitters. Yeah, it's a peaceful existence. With only two more days until the album drops, Gustavo's been WAY less of a douche, so we've been in the studio a lot less often.

Of course, those rare occasions when we _are_ in the studio, it's because Kelly is writing a check to Mr. Bitters for the collateral damage we cause with our.."adventures." Not soon after she promptly tears the slip of paper from its home, Mr. Bitters is out the door. You can practically see the dollar signs in his eyes. Speaking of collateral damage, that's what we're here for right now.

Gustavo is yelling his brains out at Carlos for spilling Hawaiian Punch on the wireless router for the entire palm woods. Now Kelly has to write an outrageous check to Mr. Bitters for him to buy a new one. Less than one minute after Gustavo's verbal assault, Carlos is back to his usual bouncy self.

"What was his problem," he asked with a twinkle of bewilderment in his eye. Kendall gave him a look that shows that he's amazed by his obliviousness.

"Carlos, you crashed the Wi-fi for the _entire_ Palm Woods," putting extra emphasis on the "entire."

"Yeah, but I don't threaten people with tying them to tha back of a pickup truck and driving down the nearest highway just over that."

"Once again, the _ENTIRE_ Palm Woods." It gave me a chuckle to see them go back and forth. Carlos's innocence and dimwittedness was so cute. Logan spoke next.

"Whatever, let's just go back home. My ears are ringing from Gustavo yelling so loud."

"OK," we spoke simultaneously.

Carlos stared at me the whole the whole drive back to the Palm Woods. Creeepy….but still cute. Logan collapsed on the couch, letting out a moan from the cushions.

"Well, that was…interesting. Tell me again why we had to go with you," Kendall said.

Carlos shrugged.

"I don't know, but I _do_ know that I missed out on 1 hour of hair care tv!"

They gave me an "STFU" look.

"James, screw your hair. Let's just go to bed." I took one of my, dare I say beautiful locks and stroked it.

"He didn't mean it baby."

I dozed off into a peaceful sleep, filled with enough hair care products to last me 6 lifetimes. I was ripped from my deep slumber by Carlos pushing on my shoulder.

"You want to go swimming?"

"Carlos, it's 3 in the morning."

"So? That's the best time. There's no one else and it's so peaceful."

I let out an exasperated sigh and spoke, "OK, give me five minutes."

I found a pair of silver and white swimming trunks and picked a red and yellow towel. "Let's go."

The water was cool on my skin, washing away all the stress and yelling of the day. I wasn't as much swimming as I was enjoying and appreciating the peacefulness of the usually bustling pool area. Carlos was much less subtle, performing belly flops and cannonballs. He was, once again, so cute when he emerged from the bottom of the pool with his raven locks plastered to his forehead.

"Didn't I tell you this'd be fun?"

"Yeah, you did. But who the hell swims at 3:30 in the morni-. My sentence was interrupted by a set of soft lips smashed against my own.

I was shocked at Carlos doing something like this and tried to push him away but he was surprisingly strong for his small stature. He ended the kiss and in stared at him with a look of confusion.

"Get off me!" I attempted to break free from his grip, but it only tightened with enough force to make my eyes squint.

"Don't you ever talk to me like that again." He punched me in the stomach making me almost double over in pain.

"I've been waiting for this for so long."

He roughly pressed his lips to mine again. The contact lasted for what seemed like forever.

"If you yell or even whimper, I'll make this so much more painful." A flash of fear and amazement crossed my face.

"Wait, please, Carlos! Please don't do this!"

"Shut up." He pulled down his trunks and ordered me to turn around.

"Please…" I whispered pitifully. "Didn't I tell you to shut up?"

He forced his way inside me and I could feel my inner walls being ripped and damaged. I had to bite my lip and bury my arm in my shoulder to prevent myself from yelling out, afraid of what other punishment he would do. _A cloud of blood drifted to the surface as he roughly thrust into me. I begged him to stop but in his eyes, there was nothing there except the darkness of a thousand nights. In stark contrast to his olive skin. My cries were falling on deaf ears._

His painful thrusts and shoves became more erratic as he was close to his climax. He grunted guturally and came deep inside me.

He pulled out and said indifferently, "Let's go." I laid in my bed crying, staying awake for fear of reliving this nightmare over and over again.

So? What did you think. Sorry it took so long to update I kind of forgot about the story. I've been obsessed with High School of the Dead. There's more to come!


	2. Revelations

_I was face book chatting with my best friend when I wrote this. She *joe swanson voice* MOTIVATED ME! Wow I really need to update regularly…..*mumbles something about chaitra…*_

_And let's just pretend carlos is _

_James POV_

_I got up cautiously from my bed, careful not to agitate my throbbing lower body. I walked, or rather, limped to the bathroom. I fumbled around, disoriented from the lingering effects of the pain and abuse my body was forced to endure the night before. When I finally turned the light on, the light brought a shocking revelation to light from my reflection in the clean glass of the mirror._

_My eyes were red, puffy, and swollen from crying. Hair, which was never unkempt or dirty, was matted to my forehead in clumps of dried sweat. The residue of dried tears outlined the bottom of my eyes and left a white trail under the crystal orbs that had now lost their luster and shine, as they rolled down my cheek and dropped to the floor. The realization of what had happened came back almost too fast as I stumbled back against the towel closet and sunk to the floor. My body curled up into a fetal position. Cries tore themselves from my throat and I found myself thanking God that…that no one was there to hear me. I've never felt so miserable in my life….so….dirty, so disgusting, so…..betrayed…._

_Carlos POV_

_Screams of agony woke me up. I looked around and raced through the large apartment looking for the source. I came to James's room and stopped before I opened it as all the memories of the night before came racing back. My heart pounded at the revelation of what I had done to one of my best friends. We grew up together and I hurt him. He trusted me with all his secrets, insecurities, and problems. I can't believe I could be so cruel to someone I knew since childhood. _

_He wouldn't want to talk to me. He wouldn't want to see me ever again. I silently turned away from the door with tears in my eyes as I went back to my room. I put in my ear buds to drown out the sound of my best friend's cries as I silently changed, ignoring the unchecked flow of tears as they overflowed my eyelids and fell to the floor._

_I walked out the door. I walked away from my best friend…..who I loved._


	3. Author's Note

So what did u think of the chapter? Sorry it took me so long, and I promise it won't take so long next time. But if I don't get 20 reviews ill send chuck Norris after u….and we all know what happened last time I did that….so review.


	4. Author's Note 2

. REVIEW


	5. Clarity

**O my god u guys must be so pissed at me. Im sowwy. :3**

**Carlos POV**

**Thoughts of remorse and disgust raced through my mind as I sped down the highway. I hated myself for what I did to him. Disgust tinged my every movement, as if I didn't deserve to breathe, or blink. Maybe I don't? ….. **

**I had no destination or purpose other than to clear my head of the terrible cries torn from my friend's throat. To search for some kind of clarity and peace in, frankly, the most fucked up weekend I've ever had.**

**James POV**

**I composed myself when I heard the door open in the front of the apartment.**

"**Kendall!"**

"**Carlos!"**

"**James!"**

**I didn't reply. I wiped my face to erase the evidence of my fit of crying and heaving. Taking a deep breath, I opened the door. **

"**James, what happened?"**

"**Nothing." I said, forcing a smile that could be broken at any second.**

"**O….k."**

**He walked away with a look of concern and puzzlement, unaware of the fact I was breaking inside.**

**Logan POV**

"**I wonder what's wrong with James?"**


	6. Author's Note 3

Writer's block. D:

Help?


	7. Fault

I know. I know. U can punch me. :3

_Carlos's POV___

I reluctantly coaxed open the front door, half expecting to see a corpse hanging from the banister with the words, "Your fault," carved into the wood. Apprehensively, I entered the apartment, tossing my keys on the kitchen counter next to me.

"Hey, dude."

Logan greeted me, catching me as I was about to run up to James' room, apologizing profusely for hurting him.

"Oh, hey. Didn't see you there." I said, putting on a façade.

"Where ya been?"

I had to think of something.

"Uhh, I lost my helmet, so I drove all around town looking for it. Hehe, stupid huh?"

He believed me. I was the not so bright one. The not- book smart one. Not the sharpest tool in the shed.

_There ya go, ya vultures! ,3 looove uu._


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